…love
The true heart
doubting, introspective
self clarifying
with indomitable spirit
and unbending integrity
in arduous pursuit of the truth
is searching for what is lost
that which is invaluable
a priceless jewel
confused thoughts, crowded mind
without comprehending
as though deaf and dumb
entirely in the hands of others
an inconceivable way of being
existing only in your mind
like trying to sweep away fog
or halt a river with outstretched arms
face the fire and lightning
the raging torrents
surging down from the summits
wild roaring waves
lonely, moaning winds
poisonous mists
mountains
stunned into senselessness
rivers
frozen with fright
into this maelstrom
into this wild and bitter struggle
battered by heaven
pursued by the hounds of hell itself
you run headlong
with love clutched in one hand
and with hope in the other
a gentle breeze
is blowing from the south
succumb to these corrupting winds
you have brought on your own downfall
illusory thoughts
spin through your mind
standing outside the gates
you peer within
penetrating secret depths
the mind is deep as an ocean
a sheer and profound stillness
a transparent mass of boundless emptiness
silver waves, sad musings
a great rising pain
spirits of the past
dying ten thousand deaths
in their one life
arising and subsiding thoughts
falling into fixed views
an ancient dwelling place
a pitfall that buries you alive
just like a fragment from an old coin
dragging you down
into the abode of delusory surmise
everything real ceases to exist
a solid piece of emptiness
fixed firmly in the ground
a deep hole of sheer, black silence
deeper than you can even conceive
no longer troubled by afflicting passions
pushing down
into the cave of understanding
release your hold on the edge of the precipice
attachment to the past is cut away
soon the cherry blossoms are in flower
and the river is full and flowing
bringing new life to the tender shoots
to scorched buds and shrivelled seeds
once withering in long-parched desert lands
but what happens if the source is not deep
or the stream is not long
the trees fall and the wisteria withers
thorny forests arise
as far from the lush ancient groves
as earth is from heaven
with nothing but the sobbing of dead spirits
to break the silence of their world
lying useless and forgotten
as an ancient cemetery
cold and no more life within
than last night’s ashes
in the light of a solitary flame
between heaven and earth
each instant contains all time
in all the universe
there is here in the depths of sorrow
love
© Ann Bagnall 2012
