Loss and Loneliness
Loss and loneliness circle me
staring into the mirror again
the glass reflectionless
smooth as silk
as always, I am drawn to it
drawn to the danger
the danger of falling
falling into my memories
into that place
that place that still haunts me
my heart is beating
a frantic rhythm
my eyes fixed
on the cold surface
straining to hear
the call of the past
the mirror ripples before me
and I see your face
your colours shifting
in and out of view
looking once more
into your eyes
my heart is reminded
that the mirror always lies
that the darkness within
will pull me in
and I will tumble
into the past again
becoming my own reflection
trapped beyond the glass
captured, a prisoner
of my own making
still drawn by the allure
of what could have been
until the echoes of reality
whisper to me
for mere seconds
my fingertips caress the cold glass
and as the ripples disappear
the still surface reflects my face
yesterday has faded once more
leaving me lost in the moment
and as I breathe deeply
loss and loneliness still circle me
but in my heart, I am at rest
finally at peace
with the colours of me
© Ann Bagnall
